Thursday, January 31, 2013

the town called *is* (comment attached)

in a town called *is*
there lived a man who sought to know of something beyond
birth and death
this man regarded himself to be of great prowess
he had a strong physique and felt himself healthy
and of good intellect...
he sold all of his belongings and set out to find the truth
he left behind family, friends, job and all relations 
he resolved to not look back or to come home without 
any knowledge that rang of real
he walked on a path that started right outside his door...
onward he went for awhile on this path
until he encountered a great forest called doubt --
in this forest he was pestered by all kinds of unrest that spoke 
incessantly about what a bad person he was and that maybe he was not
capable of such and awesome undertaking as this...
then immediately this  
was followed by what a good person he had been due to particular good deed 
he had done.. but then no, he was not so good and so on...
and the other familiar rant yammering on about possibly he shouldn't have started out at all--
maybe his family was right that he knew not what he was doing ..
will they accept him when he got back he wondered ..  possibly not 
maybe now he was cast off like an orphan to roam about without a single mooring 
anywhere ..
oh this is not good cried his persona... we have been left alone ..
he walked on heavy with such a great deluge of worry and unrest through this 
forest of doubt...
he slept under a tree that night and felt the shadows fall with the black enveloping his soul
and his sight felt blinded 
his heart was not there in this enshrouded place ...
he twisted and turned about on the hard earth and rose in the morning not refreshed in the least..
he picked up and continued ...
eventually he came across a man wandering in the forest looking very ordinary in his way..
he cast a quick look at him and he felt a bit free with his glance ...
the man smiled an easy smile 
and the seeker very weary said, friend i am in search of that which lies beyond birth and death..
do you know of this place?
the other journeyer said indeed i do for i live within it always...
and this shook this man of great prowess to the core...
well how so do you live in it? for i am right here where you are 
but do not see it ...
the ordinary journeyer laughed and said oh -- you have only just begun my friend ...
once you are free within it matters not where you live or what you are doing ...
the mind is eternally at peace ...
well this was quite a thing to be heard ...
why then sir, is it so very, very hard for me to be at peace when this freedom is right here and now?
for i do not feel free at all.. my mind is in such weariness, heartache and unrest...
tell me dear sir, why is this and how can i be set away from this hell that i am living?
so very strange that we both stand here looking like men and in the same setting 
yet you are at ease and speaking of peace and that is felt well as when i glanced at you
my heart sang and my soul took to a bit of rest ... i felt as if there was a light 
in this great darkness in which i am so accustom...  
how can i be freed and speak as you do sir please say?
stillness pervaded that gentle being as he spoke in his clear voice to say ...
all beings are eternally free in the heart my dear seeker ..
now it is not seen due to your false identification with the body and mental waves that rise and fall
within these waves there is no constancy or anything that can be found that is lasting ..
to attach to these waves is death really (as eternal light is covered over) and so much suffering comes from it that is to have no end...
how then said the seeker shall i get away from this misery that has clung to my heart so strong
and so very all consuming in its way? i follow it like a lost lamb in the dark calling away for 
my mother ... oh pray tell dear wise soul of the heart .. 
your words are like soft rain to a man that has been in a desert for many an era...
i am so drowned in the mess that i have made apparently ....
as you say it is i that has misidentified 
myself with this body and passing phases of mind and by doing so created a world of overpowering shadow... 
how then to disentangle please say now and i will go there ...
the first thing is to not pay attention to the thoughts and body as they are mere shadows that follow
the course of nature ..
changing, coming and going, rising and sinking ...  
be quiet and watch them as if set apart like a light that shines them up only...
my master told me to stay well away from the body and mind as if like an outcast that is to not be touched .. this was very hard at first for the being had been so soaked into this field of 
thinking i am the body and mind and it takes on a life of its own.....
so very hard to move away from, yet it must be done sincere seeker for otherwise you are drowned in 
its false spell that may seem innocent at times..
but this is indeed where it pulls you in like wolf in sheeps clothing ...
be aware of this attachment dear seeker of o ne ... 
next be honest always and forthright in character ..
true in all your dealings and ways in the world...
stay detached in all things, yet keep the heart open ...  
also, here is a mantra to say that points to the o ne reality**brahman**say it with devotion and great care
this will aide to dissolve the mind into the o ne reality that is eternal..
though you do not know of this o ne heart yet friend say the mantra like you believe in it
and feel it in you and all about, do not say it as mere rote ...
or this energy will waste away and only lead to empty repetition...
rest in the heart and have faith in the o ne ...
for it lies within yourself and nowhere else.... 
do not be afraid to be alone for this is the best way ...
dear one seek good company and if that is not there, nature is your companion and it will never, ever put you out ....  
dear wise soul, you have made it sound so simple,
but now it feels so very, very arduous and mixed with so many emotions .....
i am a bit lost right now ... yet underneath it all, your words are felt and penetrating 
in a way that is not understood by me...
wise soul, this strong urge to be out of suffering is simmering under the waves of the world i thought i knew ..
i feel unable to not pay attention there as it haunts my very being so..
dear seeker, this is because you are made as whole and eternal...
the disharmony within is telling that you are not right in identifying yourself with the false ..
the pull you feel is there because the light is in you and inherently draws one in ...
if it is disregarded then one suffers...
if it is heeded (it is still very hard) 
but in the end freeing if followed to its full completion...
then no suffering and all is set right...
hearty journeyer you must have great strength and courage now...
not strength of body, but of soul and heart...
this is not something that can be built like muscles...
it is more a breaking down of the barriers that have been held up to hide from pure life ... 
this is what true courage is friend .. 
yes wise guide .. how opposite this is than what i thought before...
for i felt i must struggle with these waves and push them aside or down to win over ..
now what you say in a way i have no power at all and what is asked now is to give over what was known as *my* power to a the greater intelligence that is not of my personal world ...
oh i am really nothing it feels ..
how very deflating to a man that is built on body and mental intellect ...
what a hard blow to this me...
yet i see you here wise light looking so much of a whole being and in fine form and frame ...
free as you say and i do feel you are true in my being...
oh my this is not easy precious guide...
no it is not, said the guide...
but this attachment and hearty ego you speak of is not your friend .. it is false and unreal
so as to keep you captive in a haunting world of separation...
well dear seeker you can always stay there where you are at...  
oh no quickly interrupted the seeker.. my soul is in great unrest now and i do not want any more of it...
what about my family and friends?...are they now not a part of my world?
am i to cast them out of my heart like they never were?
spoke the guide --the bible says one must turn away from the world which includes family and friends....  one must detach from that life (within themselves) for it keeps the soul bound to body and mind...
though this has been the way of all those within monastic life, it does not mean one needs to hide away from the world, but to let go of all inner attachments...  
the bible says follow me ...  follow the truth no matter what it calls for ...
one is not saying that responsibilities are to be cast aside when in the thick of it --
if you have put into motion a family with young children still needing to be reared then one finishes this job and then it is up to the soul where to take the journey from there ...
but know that without full detachment there will never be full realization .. not ever...
all that have come to be in truth and light have renounced the world and never returned there
the freed soul then lives in the world but not of it...
a radically different consciousness than those caught within mundane mind...
okay, said the seeker
this is what is needed and i am now in a position to leave it all..
where are you going now master? how can i find you?
i cannot say where i will land dear wanderer of the way..
but you have what is needed to complete, and now my heart is bound to yours in sincerity, light and love as we are the same truth within...
you will travel thru many different countries ..
some will ring of great unrest and some of divine light ..
keep going precious seeker until all thoughts are cleared and only the non-dual o ne remains ..
you will know it undoubtedly when it is uncovered ...
the last stop however is the town of death...
oh my shuddered the seeker ... how horrid that sounds
the wise soul laughed greatly and said do not be afraid...
and then he took to his feet and left....
the man in search of light looked about and took a deep breath of release...
he felt quite a bit sturdier within as he knew that his call to freedom was true and held great value ...
his reminiscing for the life he left behind continued to rise and fall like waves
sometimes it was all consuming ...
sometimes like a soft glow in the background...
doubts still haunted and pestered.. angel and devil voices chimed in ... random, senseless thoughts continued to rise and fall ..
but he continued to ponder this surrender thing and detached from the body and used the mantra in devotion and love...
he journeyed on for so many, many days it seemed like
as a one shorn of his homeland and like a one that knew not where he belonged
as his life of before seemed so very distant like a dream in the mist ...
he set it aside like he was told and slept in the open air...
breathing the smell of the earth, listening to the rustling of creatures and watching the shadows fall..
onward he went ..
his heart was light somedays and ridden with haunting shadows and doubts other days...
 he returned always to the mantra...  drinking in its vibration and watching the glory of natures wonders ... so very welcoming and open like a sweet fragrance of Gods creation
it felt unreal to him at times, this beautiful gift of nature
the blossoming wonders, rich greens and sweet earthy smells fresh from rain or warm with sunlight ..
he was lost there sometimes and then back came mind again...
then he came to a valley called expanse...this looks nice he thought...
things felt a bit easier and restful... thoughts were there, but did not feel so pressing down and haunting
kind of like riding a wave easily,
rather than the heavy current of mind constantly pushing against the being so as to say -- look at me! listen to me!
he breathed a bit easier and sat awhile in happiness that was very refreshing ...
so simple he thought this beautiful moment...
still there was unrest looming underneath like a bobbing thing that went under and rose up again when the conditions were ripe --
on and on like this he went...
then he came to a place that felt different also,
his mind seemed calmer and lit up with insight ...
he felt like a being at the center  of a web with strands reaching outward where all was connected and appeared harmonious and filled with love
okay, now i have finally arrived he thought ... i am very holy and special indeed...
i am one with all things and have never not been...
i am quite a light .. i am a teacher,
i am  a one filled with wonder as the earth and stars and heavens and all things glorious...
i have drunk deeply of the clear waters and sunny pastures of the universe ..
what a free soul i am and how much i have to say now about it ....
i am to be known for my way of speaking clear and deeply insightful vision that is so very high up...
look at me now, such a treasure trove of wisdom...
he felt he had arrived and continued to reflect on all that he had gained and suffered and just how
amazing of a soul and seeker he was ...
and just how much others would see this too...
he sat in this way for oh so long friends, very reluctant to leave this land of ego pleasure..
eventually however the clouds came back and the sea began to rock within
and his heart did not seem so rested in his own method of feeling things to be within harmony and light
fortunately in the depths of this view he was swept up by ...
a kernel of sense remained to see that he had not paid attention at all  to his guides wise words
that said one is not done until *all* thoughts are gone and the last town is the town of *DEATH*..
death came up to him this way in his mind *BIG* and looming above so as to say .. yes, you cannot bypass me .. though you gave it a good shot indeed
still there is no completion without passing thru me (the town of *DEATH*)....
well he wondered if he had sat here so long so as to avoid this part...
oh my how deluded mind can be and got up and shook his head about and sighed a deep sigh as he knew he was not done and needed to continue into the land of death ---
onward he went and now he knew enough to not be taken in by *any story* no matter how good it sounded...
he had learned this lesson in a very hard way...
as he had lost so much time swept up in this world of fantasy...
soon enough this place called death shown up in the distance ...
oh, there it is said his persona... what to do .. go forward, go back...
he did not know really for it felt so very real not as a dream or a projection anymore ...
and he breathed and said let the worst come and be over with...
for i feel so very weary
like a soul caught as a deer in a trap with barely a breath of life left, not fully dying
and not full living ..
Lord of my soul this is not where i want to stay
may you do what you must
and he kept going
and he sank into this haunting shadow that was the most frightening of all fears and the most horrifying
shadow that looms in all mental waters ...
and he shook to the bone at the barren feel of it
like all that was known to him was to be lost forever..
his body, mind -- the whole thing ..
so real and palpable was this feeling and there was nothing he could do as he was helpless to its strength and power and then out he went...
gone to himself...
when his consciousness awakened to the appearance of the world
all was radically changed
the dual world he knew before was rinsed clean and what was revealed was the o ne SELF of all...
so completely peaceful and at rest
so very gentle like calm waters ...
the past never happened, the future had no reality ...
beyond birth and beyond death was this pure consciousness
there were no thoughts about it
only peace, beauty and all consuming non-dual pristine awareness remained
he wasn't sure where he was at first, but then within his awareness he recognized his surroundings and knew that he was in the town called *is* ... as if he never left...
was there ever a journey?  did he ever leave this place?
my what a dream he had been lost in...
well friends his family was rather indifferent about the whole thing and barely noticed anything had changed ...
what happened next ...
this beautiful light took to his feet and walked on into the open lands
singing of pure presence and light wherever he was ..
not two,  not two...

om shanti




4 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Namaste - please note, this writing is *symbolic* of the journey within and points out some of the common experiences and potential pitfalls along the way. On this path, all are or have been karma sannyasis or renunciates that are working within the world and keeping the focus and dedication within the vows. While it is true within monastic life, the seekers are to leave the past life behind completely and never pick it up again.. there is a reason for this as the connection there keeps mental waves of drama and attachment in motion. Know that on this path, Guruji does not force any to make decisions like this ... though the sannyasi is to live the vows completely .. Guruji has never forced any to let go of family or said to never speak to them again... i can only speak to the direct experience here .. it is has been more like a natural outcome over the years of letting go and seeing what is beneficial and what is not.. also, many in the old world became very quite honestly not interested in keeping up relations as regular chit-chat falls away... As far as family goes .. my son is now 21.. i moved to florida when he was 19 and grown. Having the family obligation *out of my face* so to speak has been hugely beneficial in cutting attachment and aiding in deepening of the non-dual consciousness.. though i do not pursue the relationship there as before.. it is more now within the flow .. he may call and we chat in a light way .. and then it is let go of ... i just want to be clear that sadhakas here are on this path have free will and make their own choices as far as family life and involvement go.. (the renunciates though of course are not to be married or pursuing relationship). Still, with this said, it is absolutely true that full detachment needs to be in place for full realization... and this is why the world is to be renounced completely... and after the mind completely falls away, one can be anywhere and be at peace ... although at this point there is no attachment and no gravitational pull towards worldly pursuit and endeavor.. this is just how it works.. may all be well om shanti

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  3. Namaste, WHat a beauty in wrtiting!! Resonates here very strongly. CAn not turn away from this truth anyomore, even if was made to. Thank you for the clarification at the end as well. Onward! OMM

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  4. Namaste- Gratitude for the pointing in this piece, very much enjoyed..Om Shanti

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