God's way

i am writing this evening of the dawning of
knowledge
i may not be good at using words
but i will describe the coming of light
as best possible
the form moves with a slowness about it
the mind moves with a slowness about it
the mind sometimes is diluted heavily with
grace
then the being is consumed with a way of
simply being present without the activity
of mind and body
this is not anything like the rush, rush of the
world or the busy activity (of mind)
that most souls are pushed about by
it is a much deeper way of being that
works in it's own timeline
so often i am in a stopping position
maybe leaned up against a post
or a wall
or maybe sitting in my office
or maybe making dinner what have
you
then the whole combination mind/body is
still and empty (of mental and physical
activity)
this is something that i am not bothered by
at all
not even for a minute as i have given myself
to this journey for wherever it takes me
yet of course pray for the final verse of
this song of ego to be done for good

when samadhi takes over
it fills the mind and body with a flow
of light
the mind is drenched in it like a river
running beautiful, free and without
snags of thoughts
it flows free as a blood flow flows
thru a tree from the roots to the branches
it flows free as a waterway that does not
have constrictions or pollutants in it
it flows free as a blessing or a fountain
that runs to make a clear beautiful song
that is not of mind
it flows free as a poem that has no author
except grace
it flows free as a life force pulsing, pulsing
to the tune of purity
it flows free as a dawning of love
yes, true love that brings with it silence
the form is taken care of then quite well
it does not have any needs that are not
tended to
the mind does not have any desires that burn
and bring one to get up and *do* and *hurry*
so one just rests there
one is just taken over there
in such a good way souls,
in such a pure way
one just lives there in God's way

use it wisely

we have but a little time in this 

form/body now 

so we are to use it wisely and not 

waste our moments on forgetting 

the self and getting carried away 

by the currents of thought 

for life is a precious opportunity 

to gain realization of the SELF

and we should be cognizant always 

of this opportunity 

as we have all that we need at our 

disposal (to move forward)

there is not one thing that is not available 

to go inward 

for all one needs is awareness and the right 

intention or longing

then we can flow forward to the beauty of 

God

what we are given in body is important 

to live in this earthly realm 

but what we have been given in spirit far 

outweighs this 

for spirit is the lasting presence that will go 

on and on 

and we are to nourish that well with heart, love 

care, attention, and all that we have as tools to 

bring the mind to stillness

what is before us as obstacles does not matter 

for those obstacles are indeed a jump of point 

and help one to be of good strength, character

and sturdy presence that will not be moved

by transient happenings

obstacles are opportunities to see one can indeed

find strength in all experiences, not just the pleasant 

ones 

and to become equal-minded about life and all that 

comes 

Buddha spoke of equal-mindedness to be not 

hankering after what feels good all the time 

and not having aversion to what is seemingly 

painful or unpleasant 

these colorings of experience are mental in nature 

these colorings of experience are mind-made 

these coloring of experience are unreal and die away

these coloring of experience are mixed with the personal

view 

these colorings of experience are the making of suffering 

equal-mindedness is what is known as the middle-way

not too far this way or too far that way

so many things come along the way to experience 

but the path truly is very simple 

and all comes down to, open heart, quietude,

breathing, one step at a time, awareness, using

tools given,

love, care.. and surrender, surrender, surrender 

om shanti 

no escape

today, the unwinding continues --
there is no escape from it, try as ego might to spin it's tales of this, that, here and there...
the mind keeps coming into that death grip of deep no-thingness (that carries no persona, baggage of
accumulated concepts/conditionings and ego-centered illusive play)..
at times the mind is not so aware of this grace that is working all the while to consume the surface appearances/waves that have come to be known as the personal self, but then it hits, this all consuming substantial slowing down and falling away ...

this is the best quote to leave you with:

"Just as the prey which has fallen into the jaws of a tiger has no escape, so those who have come within the ambit of the Guru's gracious look will be saved by the Guru and will not get lost." Yes!, Yes! and more Yes!! Keep it coming!!

great day and om

slow death

souls and blessed friends,

what is taking place now is like a slow death
unwinding into this great, vast sense of peace
so light, so filled with heart and deep stillness
the waves of mind still play so much, too much,
yet so much less than before, but whether distant
feeling, insightful, loud and consuming or anything
in between, when it plays, it is too much as it
brings a feeling of the veil again that covers the
pure waters, refreshing and still....
but to get these tastes of life, free and pure is the
best blessing to feel, and get lost in...
one cannot loose vigilance during this transition
for if there is a letting down and simply saying:
oh now it is all done, then one will be carried away
again by the mind and it's re-rooting back to the
great dream..
thank God for Guru's compassion, presence and
light now and always to guide, listen and simply give
the transmission-energy that is like the ganges in the
way it flows, unobstructed, pure and without illusion
this has been the essential piece to go on this way
into something that i had no idea about how to traverse
and i have been in terror so much with it, truly souls
i am not one to embellish this playing out, so, so hard
and biting and putting all to see in your face without a
break and bringing mystics experience that could truly
make one go mad -- yes, it could and this is why it is
said to not play around with this energy of kali/kundalini/
holy spirit, but to respect it and give it time and give it
sincerity, honesty, heart, love, care, not place something on
it that is your own control or so-called ego-power... so
very, very wrong in the way of keeping this energy sacred,
keeping this energy as a best-friend really that is there to
give blessings to the soul, world and just a flow of such
grace, mystery, wonder and light, light, light...

here are the visions that flowed this morning,

the vision was one of the sun with clouds that curved around the lower part of the sun in a u-shape..
birds could be seen flying thru the clouds - one was viewing this sight up close and personal..
very stunning and clear...
then, the clouds came forward in a great line and begin to be pulled into the sun (the source), and this continued with the clouds vanishing more and more ... then the sun came forward increasingly and grew and grew and seemed to swallow up everything....

the next vision was one of a house that began to sway, the ground was moving in a wave... the house looked like it was not going to last long... behind one of the windows, one could see lights flashing (like shakti)...
then one of the walls disappeared and the bedroom with the bed was exposed (the dream)... and then the house, bed and all vanished in the depths of the darkness/substance...

also, there was a cross seen that was falling from an opening in a craggy rock structure in which the light was flooding thru, falling and burning, burning, then disappearing into the substance -- an image of a body/form then manifested and disappeared into this same substance...

this is a very brief update for the moment...

and, now one simply continues forward into that great unknown
and consciously continues to surrender, surrender, surrender...

may all be well and enjoy the moment...

great day and om

how important is it?

oh soul
tell me about yourself
your dreams, your hopes, your wishes
for tomorrow
and i will listen with a great well of heart
that is silent
with silent ears, with silent tongue
with silent deep eyes that are empty, yet
filled with awesome beauty of life's play
and those eyes will say to you
how important is it all? your story
how important is it to be holding it?
and how does it serve you?
how has it made you be free of all
the aching that stings and brings a wake
of suffering to you?
do not mistake this way that is empty
that is like a sunrise in the morning light
or a clear lake of water that has nothing
obstructing it
or an ocean deep with riches unknown
to the mind
do not mistake this body
to be anything but flesh, unable to know
true beauty
and now i say to you with eyes that are lost
to the heart
how important is it, really
your story?

the mystic way

oh men, women
come now, forget your world with me
come and fall into that great abyss of light
that flows like a river and cleanses the senses
heart and mind
let it consume you until there is nothing left there
that is taking away the truth
then when you are done bathing in this light that
clears and clears
then come with me to the world again and see
it for what it is
one undivided flow of shiv/shakti
not what the mind that is unreal has spoke to you of
be not afraid of this way of light
it is mysterious, filled with something that is not
of the mass mentality
but has it's own way that can only be felt if one
let go of the reins that you hold so tight to
let them go, do not pick them up to be the driver
but let the driver (grace) move you
through this land of the mystic way
blessed with all that is pure
blessed with all that is deep, rich, wondrous
and free

Let us unwind

what i say to you my dear

is the day will come when your 

world crumbles 

the day will come when your 

person so thought of as real

will be unknown to you any longer 

he/she will not have any more space 

to be intrusive on your reality 

this day that turns to something different 

as the sky turns to gold, orange, pink

amber, violet all at once and in one 

moment is the day you know without 

a doubt that the world you made your 

home in is mist/ephemeral/liquid air 

and when this happens, you are blessed

because you can finally breathe in something 

different that is ripe, full and is not bound 

by anything that has been created by egoic 

play 

how very beautiful 

and how very mysterious 

oh friend 

lets let our world unwind as the snake 

consumes itself and then what remains 

is nothing that can be named 

but only silence 

and we will then free ourselves from this 

powerful dream we have been living under 

and then we can really enjoy life for it's 

wondrous beauty that it is 

not tethered by the transient play of illusion

that calls and taunts and puts it's way in our face 

to be a nuisance, so disruptive it is 

we will unwind like a tape unrolling itself 

and falling to pieces right before our very eyes 

and we will not pull it back to cover our beauty 

ever again

for we freed ourselves from all that was in our

bodies and in our minds and in our soul
that was heavy

then we will go out and be as love is so free 

unconditional  like the saints, the masters, 

the stars, the ocean, the moon, the heavens 

the great heart of all 

we will indeed my dear heart

we stoop low at the gate to enter for we are not 

anything that is important in ourselves as an ego

or body, so we will bend our form and enter to be 

refreshed heartily in those waters of purity 

and we will drink deeply until our mouths

no longer ache of thirst

and we will bathe under this freshness that runs 

so plentiful 

we will bring nothing with us when we enter 

but see, my dear this is not enough to stay here 

because we must 

go on to that cliff and free ourselves of this form 

identity so burdensome and reeking of attachment 

that has truly left a residue of something that makes 

us forget our true self 

and we must go over that cliff into the unknown 

yes, we will

and then what remains is that freedom true 

that has no face or name or covering  

then we will never be divided any longer 

into that forgetfulness 

now come friend, let us unwind until 

there is no more unwinding left 

and then we are nothing any longer 

to be counted as an ego-body 

we are simply what God is 

pure stillness 

undivided, life 

oh Kali

i do not move when Kali cuts
how sweet is the sound of her scythe swinging
how momentary the sting
how life-filled the remains she leaves
in her wake
scented with fresh, bountiful beauty, fresh air
and stillness everlasting

oh Kali, come nearer
beat the air, roar in my ears
lay open my breast
soothe nothing any longer
for your way is my way, love
and i am blessed to be your student
and your friend
and your meal too (of ego) that you
devour wildly, not gently
oh soothe nothing
for the remains you leave in your wake
are like gold
scented with heart so full
fragrant as lilies of white
peaceful as the deepest oceans
oh Kali come nearer

oh Kali
do not say another word to me
oh Love
for i know your way so true
so kind, merciful
fear not, stay still, Bless my mind
wear me down
for i walk towards you
my days are your days filled with quietude
that sings like silent music
come nearer to me
finish your work
save me from myself

the death that brings life

dear friend,
do not fear death
for it is not what you think
in terms of taking life away
instead, it is a cleansing of the soul
it is like a friend to the seeker who is
open in mind and heart
it comes willingly to any who are absorbed
in the good work of clearing away the dross
and are walking the path in love
not having aversions to the hard ways or being
taken over by the pleasureful experiences
as the doctor administers to the wound a great
antiseptic that burns greatly
and it hurts to have it touched to the skin
so spirit administers salve that burns too
and wears down the dead ways of revolving energies
that keep surfacing and creating ill-usion
and what is in the bag of spirit medicine is
indeed death/surrender/letting go
it is a salve to the one that does not run from it
for it dries out or (pulls the energy that is cycling)
out of the mind to be not present any longer
and leaves a fresh flow of life there
for the mind cannot do this alone, it has nothing in there
that is of grace
grace is what gives it life to even be
and grace is what turns it towards itself to continue
it's course of engulfing or eating itself to be destroyed
the physician of heart (or spirit) will never take away
anything that is of life, light, love, joy, quietude,
peace, healing
as it is only a working that takes away the covers to this
freedom
for those that seek to aide others can do that on a certain level
but first the soul needs healing in their own self
to be able to be a light to others
and this is where the focus is needed is internal
not always working on an outside phenomena

death will be what is encountered for sure in time
but to be in fear and always running away from it is
not a beneficial thing
to be distracted always is not a beneficial thing
as this will only come again and again to your being
and to allow it to wash the dross away
is like a wave
that cleanses
and spirit is the end result and is the beginning result
and the in between
and never has there been this thing called ego
which is death (in a different way)
not a true way

Ramana-Vision writing 9-17-16

he has been appearing to my mind lately
Ramana
when driving today, i saw him
he was with his cow Lakshmi
smiling
this evening too, when lying down
i saw him with Lakshmi
he is patting her body with affection
and such love
it is hard to speak of this vision as
there is such pure silence around it
he is there, the saint
in his form, he is not present
for he shines as all
as the mountain shines of beauty
as the stars twinkle like diamonds
as the seas move with majesty
so he shines as all this way
he is with his beautiful cow that
has no sins upon her soul
for she is made unto the same light
as the sage
it is true
he puts a blanket over her now

then another scene
he is with Jackie dog
walking through a path
that is coming to the ashram
the dog
he is so intelligent and loyal
to the saint

the saint, he does not choose
to love anyone in particular
but loves all the same
unconditionally as the SELF
what is there that is more beautiful?
oh souls, this is the most beautiful
of all
for the dust of the world is like a
transient thing truly
do not take it to your soul
take light only to your soul
make your life full of it

the scenes change with the sage
near his ashram
his body is dressed in a loin cloth
cover
like those that wander the hills of
india
his form is a bit crooked in the knees
from sitting meditation so long
he sat
in the mountain caves with very little
to no provisions
yet he survived it all
and came back to live a life that was
pristine inside

i remember seeing many years back
his book in my bedroom
and when i looked at it the image
became animated
i know another odd thing to write
but you must be used to it by now
for i am not so used to ordinary
life in my mind and so be it
i  told Guruji about this and she said
he must be helping you
okay, good i said

what is he pointing to? arunachala
the mountain that sits as the SELF
yes,
it does indeed
it is the mountain that many come
to be near and live within
it has in it's interior caves an energy
that ignites spirit heart
it lingers in one's soul as the fresh rains
and deep oceans and wonderful fruit of
the spirit
it awakens the soul to be in love with the
SELF
it is a beacon to many
it puts the God essence to be in the center
it puts love where confusion once dwelled
it puts mouna where mind once dwelled
it puts spirit where the physical was the
center

i can see him fanning himself
sitting on his bed smiling
a little squirrel by him
a smile that is radiant on him
tending to him are his devotees
they feel themselves separate
so serve him
yet he sees no differences ever

this is the end of this vision writing
i never know what is going to be written about
so may you enjoy it for what it is
thank you for reading
this evening

shanti om

all that is good

spirit language is different than words/thoughts/ego-language
it flowers of love, blessings and rainbows of beauty and color
it flowers of seasons of nature
it flowers of night/day/moon cycles
it flowers of wondrous bright stars against a dark sky
it flowers of stillness that unfolds into doorways
open to the cosmos
where one sees into the mysteries free of boxes
free of dense forms/objects
free of birth, death and mundane seeing
kept as a secret inside the soul
and bursting out when the energies are in tune
with light
oh then spirit sings
of all that is good

purified by spirit

when we worship 

the form then 

the light gets 

obscured and darkened 

for the form is only the 

creative energy of God's 

work 

it is made like the earth and 

all of nature 

perishable 

not lasting in beauty, joy

love, light and perfect peace 

it is made to be a vehicle 

for the purpose of experience 

on this plane 

and one can experience only

tactile happenings with the 

physical senses and pleasures 

and pains 

or be purified by spirit

and then hear, see, taste, touch

love on a different level

that is deeper and in alignment 

with grace 

for the senses purified are the best 

gift to the soul 

the hearing then is not hearing 

and the seeing not seeing 

and the tasting not tasting 

which means that the senses 

or consciousness do not carry 

seeds of personal 

that distorts the imagery and 

experiences that come in 

to be filtered into a narrow field 

of ego 

oh soul

oh soul

hearken now 

freedom carries all that you seek

nothing lacking 

just fullness, harmony and light 

the seeker is extinguished there 

and what is left over is that which 

cannot be denied or confused or 

differentiated 

it is a constant homogenous mass 

of beautiful stillness 

unchanging 

perfection

living waters 

0

heavy with wisdom

a man weighs heavy in terms of objects 

he possesses
he weighs heavy in terms of relative knowledge

he weighs heavy in terms of book knowledge
he weighs heavy in terms of family dynamics and 

relationships 

he weighs heavy in terms of desires and body focus

he does not know that his spirit 

is truly not weighted down by the world like this 

it is formless, without any luggage to bear

it is present in stilled beauty 

it is stainless without any collected experience 

it is like a bright star in the dark sky

everpresent and undeniable

the heart of all

the righting of all wrongs 

and it is *light* 

and *heavy* with wisdom

not worldly objects 

prior to the story...

it was told to you that you are so
much like a beautiful bird
or like a swan
a paramahansa
a sage or a brilliant light
or like a one that is completely out of suffering
and forever unburdened by body and mind..
it was told to you rightly
by the means of crystal clear stillness
prior to the story...
do you remember?

dispassion

when a man takes his leave of the world

he has in him the courage and self restraint 

needed to go onward into himself 

as a one looking to be free of the false

he stays aware and alert 

to the rising ways of mind 

that come and go and distract 

and persuade 

he keeps watch on this night and day

he makes his heart shine bright 

within the mental waves 

and he makes his life one of eloquence

beauty and quiet being

he does not need a temple or 

a special sitting posture 

he does not need a friend to be near

or a lot of pomp and circumstance 

he does not need the right outer 

conditions 

for what will make him strong are the 

life experiences and the grit 

and the courage to rise above that which is 

temporal in nature

he dives into himself always --

no matter what experience

he looks, he watches 

he questions and remains quiet

he knows not the truth when mind is rambling 

he knows not the way, if mind is in action

he knows not the heart, if mind is in the center 

he knows not his calling, if thoughts are tempting 

he knows not clarity, when clouded by desire 

he knows not freedom, when in the throes of passion

by seeing this

he sees the false ways that occlude 

and takes them not again to heart
but witnesses as a one not involved
he then is as a seeker that is always immersed in sadhana

that is the seeking of fulfillment 

amongst the confusion, he is in sadhana

amongst the ways of men that are not seeking truth,

he is in sadhana

he is in sadhana at all times and under all circumstances 

not carried away by anything no matter how hard or biting 

no matter how glorious or persuasive 

he remains detached within the light of Guru's words and grace 

a man that walks this way is one that is called dispassionate in his practice 

as he is not in the world as a man within doership 

he falls somewhere in between working, effort and effortless flow

he falls in between the lines of black, white and even grey 

for he cannot be captured by definitions any longer 

he cannot be sheltered in desires and pulling temptations of the world 

for he understands this type of desirous mentality

though it may bring some temporary pleasure

ultimately brings pain -- a sting that he is not to desire any longer

he prays to his own heart (if he prays) to awaken to love and light 

he prays to his own SELF to be free of shackles and hinderances 

and habitual mind spins 

he prays to his soul that is to be made like a fire that burns all created appearances 

to ash 

he prays to the life source that is the one power of all

to be free forever and eternally..

he never lets the truth be ignored or forgotten in him

even if he is in the depths of thinking 

he feels this stir to be in love and light always 

haunting him in it's way that is not to be ignored

he lays his burden down by the waters of shiva 

he lays down the sting and the actions that brought unrest 

he lays his mind down on the earth of the universe to be absorbed in love and light
he is a man of character in himself in which he is as an example to others 

by his actions of honesty, and integrity and transparency
how has he come to this path of light?

by his desire to know himself and be free

this has carried him on

and he is to be living in the heart now 

as he can walk home and find God in it's pure state 

he can walk home and be living in joy and beauty

he can walk home and stay as a being in fullness that cannot be shaken
this my friend, is the deep seeking of truth that goes

forward to fulfillment...

this life, what is it?

what has thou to say about love?
is it that which brings comfort
and shelter from the world of woes?
or is it that which comes to tear down
the walls
and awaken one to that which
is unborn, pure
and untouched by *me and mine*?
is it wrapped up in
a man, a woman or child ?
is it a an experience of pleasure ?
or is it that which gives space
for your world, your life
and all that enters there to be?
does it come happy at times
with high waves
and sink down low again?
or is it steady in beingness
not to falter and die away?
like a mountain
this love
what is it?
can you say?

what has thou to say about life?
is it something that is personal?
or is it a flow of pure grace
that has not a name attached?
does it revolve around people and places
things that come and go?
or is it simply here
as a mystery to be lived
and this is all
is it a memory or thought or
experience to look forward to?
is it marked by days and years
and expectations?
or timeless
unchanging in it's essence
a great adventure in which
one knows not what is around
the next corner?
this life
what is it?
can you say?

rooting up the debris/kundalini...

kundalini will bring up all the judgements, fears,
conceptual thinking, habits, vasanas (energetic patterns),
attachments etc.. and put them in your face 24/7
what this journey is truly about is to face them, question them
until those concepts that keep one locked in a cage of being a
certain way or believing one is confined to a body and mind
is broken through for good ---

the unlearning path

knowledge that is praised by the world is that knowing

that comes from learning 

while this has its place and is needed on some levels

true knowledge does not have content within it

there is nothing to study to be truth

so the scholar will not find it that way

it is more of an unlearning path

where one goes backward into the source 

to be burnt in the fires of purity

in which one becomes what they are originally

and though some sages may speak very eloquently

inside, truly they know nothing and are more childlike

not different from anything or anyone else

just one

how simple is this? 

just plain slow..

it is so strange when the mind slows
it is like a tape recorder unwinding
the thoughts are sluggish, slow
what one is used to in there (when
thoughts are present)
at least for here, all of the sudden
change
it is like a tape put on slow speed
where the voice is deep and low
and just plain slooowwww
so very strange
or sometimes the thoughts
sound far away and garbled
and other times simply stop
nothing, just stillness
ah, let those old tapes keep
unwinding...

tantra (fire heart)

when i have seen tantra in my
mind's eye
i have seen a current or band
that is very dark
with a current of blood red running
through it
the dark is representative of that deep
dark mystery of the absolute
the red that sacrifice of the soul
that offers it's life up to the source
this is a very potent emblem
that is not superficial in the least
it is a path that is walked for lifetimes
ending in dissolution
into the source of all
tantra is made of this richness that is
concrete/ rock solid with a magnetic
pull to the center
in which nothing
can come up against it


so alive this fire heart of tantra
that it is hardly a one that can be spoken
of easily
for it is like a blend of nature's most pure
creation as well as the richness from which
all springs
it comes like a volcano that is eruptive in it's
potential
it comes like an unbound ground energy
it comes like an uncreated condensed energy
that is so powerful
beyond imagination
sexuality, my friends is merely a way of putting
this light in a box in which souls want to play
at making it into something spiritual
this is so not correct
for this energy is the *loom or weave*
(which is what it stands for)
which means it is the thread that runs through all
things
it is God made manifest in the creative world
and there is nothing that can make it into anything
different not for a moment
for it has at it's roots antiquity at it's finest
as all the healing, yogi, nun, sadhu, sage types
of energies have
they are based on something that is not of this world
in it's way
nor will this beautiful energy make itself privy
to many
only those that have been cleared of mundane energies
and have that connection
to soil it and place it somewhere else in the physical realm
is like taking a beautiful, pristine gem and tarnishing it
with dirt
it is not going to glow in it's finery that way ever
for we see this happening so much in the world
pristine ancient light being tarnished by something else
that does not ring at all of the original
but still, even with the worldly things that come out
to make something different out of this beauty
it lives always as it is
pristine, deep, mysterious, potent, fire, light-filled
wondrous
and nothing that is put over it will ever change that

a light so glorious

pure
undiluted truth
so glorious
so sweet
that it melts the souls that walk by
and they cannot say what they came to say

if they are sincere and honest in heart
when they speak, it is to say thank you
for showing me what is true and right
thank you for showing me the way out
of my locked cage
i will go renewed and drink of the waters
that are pure
i will be something that rises in beauty like the sun
i will smell like the sweet earth
and put to my lips only words that bring joy
and revive hearts that ache
i will be what i was meant to be
the SELF always

austerities

the heart 

is the cave where the sadhu lives

with the dhuni fires 

that burn night and day 

he does his austerities for the lord 

and these austerities are very harsh 

to his body

they strip him of the world in the way 

of making him not attached to the form-shadow

that is as a dream

the austerities are consciously done when he 

is in meditation postures

or even when he is walking about with bare bones 

exposed to the elements of nature 

this is painful to bear 

but he bears this as a one that is in love with God 

but friends, 

these austerities come in the course of this journey 

of kundalini 

whether the seeker consciously does them 

as the sadhu in his right way of doing them 

or a one that is in the world has pain and bodily 

hardships and/or mental that cause that one to either 

run away or surrender 

because most will not surrender 

of their own accord (as this is how ego is)

and hardships cause the mind to be panicked and go 

wild 

but eventually

a one that is in love with the SELF

that one must find the faith 

that one must find the substance 

that one must find the strength to go on amidst 

much hardships and burning of all sorts 

this is not to say that one needs to be in love with 

suffering, not at all

but to know that there are many experiences
that come
that call one to stay steady and truly live
what is being spoken about in the scriptures
to truly embody the faith, the surrender
this is the way of all those that walk the path
of knowledge
this is the way of all those that walk the path
of surrender
it cannot be simply a philosophy or understanding
but a true embodying

the simple one

the poor man is blessed
the one impoverished of worldly
dynamic
he is the simple one
he lives as if he has no clothes
or layers of complicated philosophies
he has no food to eat either that tastes
of drama (or the story of *me and mine*)
yet he is starving never
for he is a humble one
and lives on food that is wholesome
food that satiates his soul
happy, content
not looking always to fill some hole
that has only come from ego's stories
he eats the bread of God in faith
and what befalls him, he worries not about
his dwelling is simple
to him he has all he needs

vision 6/3/16

this morning vision:

burning structures, the ground is in ashes.... two buildings still burning
one can see the fire coming from them (bright and hot)
and the smoke dispersing all around ...

then, one could see a long fence that was being broken apart
and it was heard,
this is a very flimsy fence Siddhananda

then, a bridge appears and someone is walking across it
walking through terrain after terrain that changes in it's
texture and feeling, rocks, fields, and different countries
then, a mountain is walked up with great jutting cliffs
and narrow paths...
it was heard,
she lost her footing here many times
but did not fall, just lost her balance... now she is
making her way up again...

then, it was heard,
the morning star awaits,
the new dawn too and the flowers are growing.
all of this can be seen at the top.


and then, this poem:

are you looking up from those jutting structures
again?
(that last look maybe today)
for those ghosts are racing after you
and very fast indeed
and when you are cornered (yet again)
i wonder if this time you will stay there
and ponder the questions that burn?
or spin and spin again
and i wonder too, if that pain there
so nagging is a doorway
that leads outward to the greater view
where seeing is not couched in individuality
hmmmm, i wonder if that heart you hold bears
secrets that whisper your name
and lead you to that place of light
what can i say, but find out
for are you walking somewhere greater
or just simply existing for now
i wonder?

the monastic life

in the past when the climate was

pure for seeking 

seeking was much honored

and not put aside or taken casually

those that were renunciates took to the 

path in it's traditional way

which was to don the ochre robes 

and wear the ornaments that spoke 

to the monastic life 

which were varied in their nature 

but very much honored and seen

as marks of a heart that was in the 

contemplative order 

when a monk takes to this life 

he is as a person that

has renounced responsibilities

such as rearing family and working 

in the world 

this type of undertaking has as it's base 

great meaning and purpose 

it is to keep the mind focused on God 

the monastic is to be always disciplined 

in the way of putting the eyes 

on the light in terms of scriptural reading 

and contemplation

he lives in a secluded area because he 

is as an island to himself in a way

as he is the sole being that is responsible 

for his journey

and there is no one else that can walk it for him

he is the one that is the keeper of the faith

and he is the one that is the protector of his silence 

he is the one that is the guard of his kingdom

he is the one that lets enter into his paradise 

seeds of untruth or seeds of great blessings 

that grow in the form of quietude and joy

not any one else plants these seeds 

he is the one that waters the blessings 

or destroys them by looking to the impure thought 

the monastic is not a person of the world 

he is as a soul in love with God 

which means he is in love with the SELF 

that is in his own soul

when there is quietude within his mind 

he finds joy in this 

when there is silence that has no personhood in it 

he finds great sustenance in this 

which steadies him to move on into the 

unshakeable stillness in which no experience 

can touch 

he is like a mystic 

as a sadhu that wanders to the light 

he is the same 

the monastic life has it's purpose that is 

good and pure 

but as this path shows when one can be steady

in stillness while in the world 

this stillness will be very solid 

and not easily moved 

as this is much, much harder ...

but can be done 

and will come to those hearty journeyers 

that are true inside and seek pure life 

this will indeed come 

love the moment

love not the dying appearance 

instead love the moment 

it has no experience in it 

that is to burden you as it wants 

nothing at all 

not even your liberation 

it needs nothing at all

not even your desire or efforts

if you love the moment 

then your mind is not so intrusive 

as it takes a back seat 

and is not the driver any longer 

what is left?

Prime with life
and love
what is there to believe
angels?
what is there to create?
what is there not to know?
what is there left to do?
what is in the fires still to burn?
what is the other way to be?

Can you not know
what you are?
How is this so?

My being rests in the One
How about you?
Are you any different?

to be free

if you are to be free
hold none as enemy or friend
in thy heart
be of equal mind and
do not chase the shadows of youth
and body desires
be of pure spirit
like the ones that
are beautiful and
untainted as the day
the soul came to be

spun by light

holy shiva

he opened the gate to the flow of spirit illustrations and by these illustrations showed

that humanity is never  truly in those dark corridors or has to remain there

but given always a key to unlock the structures

of thinking that cast shadow onto the mind-heart-jewel

he showed, with his appearance of light, a way thru the passages that lead to more empty dreams

with his showing up, a door opened and the messages of hope came where that which is seemingly not right and weighed down could open up and use that experience as a jumping off point to another reality that brings about a different playing out 

he showed, shiva (through the illustrations), that those souls that felt they were shunned, dirty or wrong in action

that there was no such thing as a person that has sinned

if he opens his heart fully to the God-essence 

then that one can breathe in a different air that is cleaner and will filter out the dross in its own time and way that is not understood by that one at all

because that one is in their head and has no idea what truth is or what another reality feels like

they are not cognizant of it   

for the mind sees only thru the lenses of the collected apparitions or conditionings that cast a color onto the consciousness and that one has no seeing clearly of the truth

he showed too, that those ones desiring of light, love and peace can come any time

to those fresh waters and taste of something that rings of ripeness, beauty and heart  

shiva came when she was with Guru and this was opened 

he came 

he wore his clothing of holy righteousness that was spun by light, stillness, wonder, beautiful lifting God-cloth   

on his head, he was crowned with the moon that signifies time and that all in it's own time

not in ego time this is not  at all correct 

he wore the Ganga waters that flow as the rushing clear waters with vigorous energy to cleanse the mental habits, actions, non-harmonious elements so not in alignment with Christ

he came wearing his tiger skin covering that is to signify the burning of the form-mind-energy so very seemingly powerful in the way of being all consuming to the soul 

and so uninterrupted and fearsome sometimes, but that energy dies to Shiva

and he wears it to signify this  not as a conquering, but to show that energy has death in him 

and is not real and lasting whatsoever 

he lives as pure consciousness  

he is decked out in his attire that has emblems of life eternal 

his third eye is awake and is not seeing the world as two, but as one in the way of being 

forever unified with shakti

shiva came, he was decked out in freedom emblems that are to tell you that he lives in all things 

never away from any, not for a moment even, never 

he is eternally in all beings at once without measure 

equal unto all as a single light 

the messages flowed, you know, they do not say what is untrue 

for these call to the soul to say,

please do not be persuaded by desires, thinking, greed, prejudice, pride, appearances but go inward to your being and be in what is called shiva-nature 

the messages cry out to you friends

that you do not need to be in your suffering ways any longer than what you create in your mind

for the light is forever open to your being and is to flood into your 

heart-mind when you allow it 

making time

many rich traditions of the past are becoming diluted 

down to the point where they will one day die out 

this is so very sad 

for those traditions that have at their heart, the honoring 

of spirit and nature are so very rich with wisdom and lessons 

for humanity that could help to alleviate suffering and restore 

balance to the earth and spirit in a way that nothing else can

these traditions treated the earth like a beloved friend

and made from it's soil beautiful bright tools,

pottery, art and so much more that resonate with the song of love, 

joy and connection to all that lives 

these traditions gave back to the earth as a 

way to say thank you for what was given to sustain the life

this feeling of being connected to a greater whole in which all 

live and have at it's core the same heart is very lost now 

drowned out by other voices that speak of something that is not 

clear anymore 

and many actions are now steeped in ways that are so very far away 

from spirit that it is not recognized or felt any more 

it is very sad to see the earth spoiled the way it is and to see 

humanity's actions veer so very far away from God-source 

heartbreaking truly

and yet it is what is happening now 

there is nothing that can truly make changes in this way that 

is now deep in the mental attitudes/actions that we are now seeing 

but to make the journey to the heart 

and the journey to the heart is taken within a mind-set of simplicity,

openness, gratitude, quietude, and what brings the soul/mind peace,

not stirs it up more with questions, worry, doubts, desires etc...

for these will only be fuel for more of the same 

it is hoped that more souls settle down and make time for quietude, 

simplicity, reflection

spending time in nature and cultivating a character based on 

values of honesty, transparency and integrity

for without this foundation in place, the wheel will keep spinning in the direction it is 

and this vibration now is what will continue to be seen, felt, heard and passed on

so,  for those souls desiring of something that rings of heart, freedom, joy 

and are willing to go forward into this,

may you be blessed 

and may you find everlasting peace

another way

hearken friend, 

the doves are flying across the sky 

in a stream of white 

and the eastern star glows so light-filled 

in the heavens 

the play of the world lives on below like 

an illusion that is made of that which 

comes and goes 

and worldly mental ways that have no 

real life in the heart that sings of wonders 

and riches so precious and filled with the 

christ-consciousness 

in this consciousness light is alive, present in 

abundance and without the colored lenses of 

philosophies, mental collections, intellectual 

ways that put men, women and all that live into 

boxes of  this and that...

there is something that sings of another way that is 

so very different from this type of playing out 

that it cannot even compare or be held up against 

anything to understand it like other 

mental types of happenings and playing out 

it lives pristine, completely still, and nothing can ever 

darken it's beautiful clear fountain of wisdom, clarity,

timeless treasure, light, love, harmony... 

just a symphony of all the treasures that live
inside the heart 

it sings of another way that is so very different

Buddha Mind

Mind is empty in it's pure state
self luminous and clear
nothing that can be described
as it has no origin
it is causeless
that which is caused has a birth
and therefore subject to decay and death
that which has no origin
is untouched and remains constant
through the shades of causal happenings

The nature of pure mind is liberation
appearances that rise within it
are empty and insubstantial
to allow mind to rest within it's true nature
and not grasp at appearances
is to get a taste of buddha mind

Pure mind is liberating
pure mind liberates thoughts and appearances
if there is no grasping
like a bird flying into boundless space
this is a thought
that rises in pure mind
a cloud formation does not touch it's essence

how blessed..

the non-dual texts speak always of one

heart friends this is what is real

spoken by voices that are free of illusion

this truth shines so undeniable in this writing 

as the sun pours it's light forth at high noon

and can be felt by all that live under it 

and turn their face upward 

how these words melt into the heart and mind like this 

writing of this sort is of it's own category

and cannot be set up against writing of a dualistic nature 

that speaks to me and you and this and that 

and becoming and gaining and losing and all the 

woes and struggle of mundane existence 

the non-dual writings flow from the source directly

as honey flows from the sweetest body of water 

it quenches deeply and takes away

only what is creating bondage 

this writing is so very rare as to not be of interest 

to those taking up the reins of the cart and horse
of worldly desire

where will this lead? only to more of the same 

but to those souls that are to turn inward into themselves
and look deeply at what is real and lasting

and are graced with Guru's compassion

and teachings 

and are in the way of devoting their lives to the truth 

to these ones 

even a few words spoken from the lips of a completed master 

will strike the cords of the heart 

and begin to tear away the coverings of illusion

how blessed is the soul that opens in this way

how blessed is the soul that keeps as it's steer and rudder 

the faith that all is ONE 

how blessed is the soul that carries not the shadow of the past 

and projections of the future 

how blessed is the soul that discovers the path of heart 

how blessed is the soul that keeps on step by step

and does not turn back to the world of shadow

oh men and women that desire freedom

keep steady

and have faith in the words spoken by those free of 

suffering for they speak the truth that resides in all hearts

these words speak to what has always been 

and cannot be otherwise 

which is that all is ONE 

all is without death and without suffering 

beyond body, beyond mind 

this is the truth

Her Grace

since this writing, the visions are appearing even less, they are waning to the point where it feels like

something left far behind, like something very misty....
in the end, just another stepping stone/wondrous scenery along the way....

sunday 6/12/16


her grace is here this evening
in a gown of blue and white
a white covering falling from her
head
she is now all in white
with a white light beaming
from her heart center
and at times turning to gold
she draws up my chin to look
in her eyes that are like moonbeams
with clear, deep oceanic beauty
completely cleansed of earthly attachments
her complexion is silky, creamy and
without blemishes
i have not seen her so clear for awhile
and have not called to her
she appeared after meditating in my
mind and now stands statuesque and
of etheric heaven energetic presence


when i see the visions
they bloom to my mind
as an aliveness of colorful life
not dead and flat appearing
they bloom as a show of
wondrous unfolding
fortunately, there is not the flooding
of these visions since the blood
moon period ended
but still they manifest
sometimes more shadowy
sometimes crystal clear
here and there
they engulf one in sensory mystic
phenomena of visuals and
sound sometimes
and even taste, touch all of
the sensual feelings of the form
but are extrasensory too in which
they are outside of the regular senses

when you see her in your mind
you will taste her sweetness
that lingers in your being
she is not of this world view
but lives timeless
absent of egoic nature
she rises out of the murky waters
to love the heart-soul
she is the treasure of all
and appears in manifestation to
be seen as the goddess of light
to say to all
love thy heart
keep it well and pure
love the mind less
those thoughts will not
say to you what the goddess
says which is
all is free and kept pure
and out of suffering
this is said psychically
as no words are there to
hear
this is said in silent ways
where nothing is communicated
better and more clear
this is said in stillness where
words have no true way of
survival
because they are not anything
lasting but shakti only
she says now to you
be still souls
wake up
pray for this
for the world needs souls of light
so very badly
and you will only be blessed if
you listen to this message
be living easily and do not
forget the heart
do not forget the heart
not ever

Kali Mandir Temple

The Kali Mandir Temple in india
makes animal sacrifices on a regular basis
this is shocking to many to hear
but is not an uncommon practice with those
set on rituals that bring purification
the animal nature is what is to be destroyed
this is one of the deeper meanings of this ritual
the animal nature is what creates vibrations that come
from a lower plane
in the way of looking for physical connections and
hungering for pleasures that are not
of spirit or lead to anything holy
the animal nature are cravings, seeking always to satiate the
appetite in one way or another
this is what takes place in the world for many ongoing
...unending in it's pressing desire
so to sacrifice this nature of animal is what is offered over
to grace
to be burnt in the fires that purify...

The Kali Mandir Temple
makes goat sacrifices -
Guruji has spoke on this many times
that it is the stark taking away of life in one instant
in one breath, it is here, and the next gone
never to return as that unique manifestation
this is what death is --
no joke
coming at a time unknown --
and at *any* time...
completely impartial ..
not more lenient with one, than another ..
this is why some of the Buddhist rituals
truly live each moment as if it could be the last
always prepared within and without for death
to take the form-
this is also how the path is to be walked ..
staying in the heart and savoring each moment
without attachment...

The nandi bull is set on the altar facing
the Shiva Lingam
why?
because this is the animal/physical type of nature that is to be subservient
to the absolute --
and to be destroyed in the heat of Kali which is Guru's grace

The body is a vehicle truly and gives an opportunity
to enter into that which has never been born
and never dies ...
this is the end that is the beginning
and is the fruit that comes when one continues..
until then..
one holds steady in the moment ..
one breath at a time ..
one step at a time...

Om

a woman

a woman came tonite 

she was like a beautiful glow 

she wore only white 

her face was as an angel

so soft were her features 

her gait was light and as 

a feather that 

lifted itself easily 

with the natural flow of things 

she came close to your ear

and whispered,
my dear, you are lost in yourself, 

how come?

have you been thinking too much?

have you met something in the world 

that is so much better than 

truth? 

what will make you come back

to your soul? 

what will make you come to your joy?

oh dear one, 

what beauty is in your soul

and how it sings of love 

how it stills your thought 

how it is so full and rich

i am your perfection of beauty

and sing of truth only

come to me now

and be free

the lion and the lamb

i have not come in the way of haunting

or making of myself a name

i have come in the way of love

and have made of this life an open meadow

in which to wander freely without hinderance

i have come like a lion

and a lamb

in purity and beauty as this combination

is what has bred a spirit of great strength

and innocence

i have come in the way of *being* and not 

taking or giving what is not helpful to 

humanity or those that are in need of 

pure water to drink for the soul

i have come like a light 

in the dark of the night

as to make of my presence one that is 

of a hearty and true gift of peace

and do not want what is the nature of

misery or shadow

i cannot be a way that is of misdeeds or

watered down spirit

that dries the earth bed and makes not the 

precious life to bloom in glory

i cannot be of a nature that is of the dark

or the impure

oh my this would not be good at all

or have worth at all
i have come like a child
pure and deeply wise
so mighty in hand and tongue
as to right what is wrong
and seize the wandering energy
reign it in so all is made the way
it is meant to be
within perfection
beautifully true
and glorious

i have come

be with what is here...

be with what is here
now
not in the drama of mind
as this only serves to create
more shadows
and false realities...

in the end

souls, 

do not be persuaded by thought-waves 

for they are the surface energy of mind 

they speak of the world with it's passing phases 

as being cast in judgement or layers of personhood 

they speak of a world that is cast in shadows of 

conditionings that come from the root *me and mine*

they speak of a world that is washed in colorizations 

of time-element which is movement created by 

thought 

these thoughts are not at all true in what is heard 

for if you go in deep, you will see little by little

they will slow and die away

like a wave that was taken to be real 

these thought-waves make life something 

that is centered around a body-image, a 

person who is such and such and does such 

and such 

this is simply thought projection

these thought waves make life into a drama-story

that is fiction and when you stop believing in it 

and come inward 

there is a different reality that emerges 

it is different in the way of being made of 

light, beauty, joy, timeless in nature 

these thought waves take a long time to 

dissolve

so one must be vigilant and keep the heart 

always set on God-light 

and keep the heart always set on spirit-heart 

with the heart in the right place 

the snake will eat it's tail 

and there will be nothing but light in the end 

then there will be a coming back into pure life 

in the end